All mums have other mum friends. Friends who are in total solidarity with the dramas of parenting and keeping you feeling like you're not alone. It's great to have friends who understand what you’re going through.
But EVERY mum should have a non-mum friend. There are so many positives to having a different chicken in your flock besides bringing a little colour to your world. Here are my top 5.
#1 Outside Life
As a Parent, sometimes you’ll find yourself cut off from the outside world. Everything is babies, kids, husbands, hiding in the loo “pooping” but really you’re just reading. Non-mum friends are your lifeline to the outside world. They know the ins and outs of who, what and when’s.
#2 Can act as your Calendar
Because they’re not being distracted with gremlins or hiding in the loo (except whilst hiding from self-centred co-workers), they’re able to remind you of all the friend gatherings, parties, and general life things because they didn’t forget to put it in their calendar.
#3. Girls Night Out
Friends without kids still go out. WHAT?!? Yes, they do, because they have money, and the freedom to go out whenever they like to, because a small person isn't screaming whilst holding their legs. So they’ll keep you motivated on a girls night out to go for it, and attempt to not let you call it a night at 8:30.
#4. Girls Night Out 2.0
It's so much easier to plan a girls only date because only one of you needs to find a babysitter. I know some of us are lucky to have permanently built in baby sitters (the other co-founder of that crazy thing called your family) but sometimes we aren’t. So when only one of you needs to find a babysitter, it opens up a much wider window of gathering times.
#5 They still get it
They don’t have to be mum to totally understand that life can sometimes be a total shit fight. They may not understand the exact reasons behind your drama, but they’re in those trenches with you dealing with drama of a different kind. They’ve still got your back no matter what.
Now if you have a really good non-mum friend like I do, she’s your very best friend. They may not understand all the parenting drama, but they know it's your drama, and they’re there to help you in any way they can. They will come over for cheese and wine night at your place instead of going out, because its easier than getting a baby sitter. They’ll yell Total Eclipse of the heart with you, whilst wearing a Dorito packet on their head, to make you laugh. They’ll wake up on a blow-up bed with a hangover, being jumped on by a giggling 2 year old wearing a “Shine like a diamond” onesie. Because to her, you’re not just a mum, you’re her friend.
Don’t neglect your non-mama friends ladies. I know its hard, I know those kids are wrecking the house, but call your non-mum friend over for a cuppa and a chat. You both might really need it.
To my Main bitch, and the only Frenemy I've ever had. 15 years (with a six-month gap of loathing one another) we’ve had each other's backs.
For the good, the bad and they pretty damn recent ugly stages. You are the Cristina to my Meredith. The Rory to my Lorelei. The Monica to my Rachel. I love and miss your face Mole.
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